This month I wanted to bring some light and guidance on a topic that comes up a lot with my clients. They often tell me – ‘I don’t have any self-confidence’ this can be a real issue for some.
If you look in the dictionary you will find the definition of confidence is something similar to this – ‘belief in oneself and one’s power or abilities’
To achieve success – however that looks to you – having belief in yourself and your abilities goes a long way in helping towards your accomplishments.
When you find that your self-confidence has taken a nosedive, it can colour all aspects of your life and be really debilitating.
Without taking empowering action it’s return can be elusive.
A fragile self-confidence can be affected by numerous things, below I have addressed a few…
- SITUATIONS not turning out the way you had hoped for – especially when this is something you have invested a lot of time and energy into.
- COMMENTS made directly to you by others, that leave you questioning your abilities.
- Underlying BELIEFS that you do not possess enough skills for a certain activity.
- COMPARING yourself to others (comparisonitis or imposter syndrome).
- Allowing your FOCUS to linger on the parts of your life that leave you feeling out of sorts, unhappy, frustrated or even feeling like a failure – I’ve been there, it’s an easy but unpleasant place to slip into, especially if you go there often.
- LACK OF ACTION – not taking the time to take care of yourself and how you feel.
So, what can we do about it? While I don’t believe there is a one size fits all winning formula, there are many things that you can introduce into your life that will bring some measure of success.
Taking the time to monitor how you feel when you engage in these activities is key to bringing together a series of actions that work particularly well for you.
It is also worthwhile noting that these need to be done on a daily basis (except step 6) so that the consistency of them has time to produce the desired effect.
Here are my top 6 ways to improve your self-confidence.
- Begin your day by planning how you will CELEBRATE your wins from the day before – it doesn’t need to be something big; it can be something as simple as setting aside time for a soak in the bath with your favourite music and scented candle. This helps you to start your day by focussing on what you achieved yesterday instead of worrying about what you haven’t.
- Engage in DAILY EXERCISE – even if you only take a brisk walk (or whatever you can manage safely). This will increase your heart rate, moving your blood around your body quicker and in turn this increases your energy and helps you to feel good.
- Make a conscious decision about how you will use SOCIAL MEDIA – this is currently one of the biggest contributors to imposter syndrome and can easily be avoided by simply managing your time and engagement on social platforms. Taking time out from social media for a few hours or a day can really help if you know this is the poison to your confidence.
- Ensure you FOLLOW THROUGH on your planned celebrations, – it is really easy to plan at the beginning of the day and then realise you forgot about it, – prioritising this will really help you to anchor those wins in.
- At the end of the day REFLECT on your accomplishments – big and small. You may start off with only a few small things, but as you get better at this step you will discover that your focus shifts onto realising you are achieving more and more.
- Regularly (every 12 weeks is ideal) IDENTIFY SKILLS that you know you are good at, those that need attention, or you would simply like to improve and plan your time, finances and energy for this to happen, ensuring you take action on that.
You will need to take each of the above actions daily and be consistent over at least 30 days in order to really feel the benefits. Some people feel an improvement in less time as everyone’s situation is different and unique.
I would love to hear from you about how this has helped you so please do email me at [email protected]
To discuss your personal situation in more detail and identify what your next step should be whatever that may look like I invite you to book a free 30 minute call with me here
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